Revising Narrative Texts: Drafting a Conclusion and Using Transitional Words and Phrases | EL Education Curriculum

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ELA G4:M2:U3:L12

Revising Narrative Texts: Drafting a Conclusion and Using Transitional Words and Phrases

In this Lesson

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These are the CCS Standards addressed in this lesson:

  • W.4.3: Write narratives to develop real or imagined experiences or events using effective technique, descriptive details, and clear event sequences.
  • W.4.3c: Use a variety of transitional words and phrases to manage the sequence of events.
  • W.4.3e: Provide a conclusion that follows from the narrated experiences or events.
  • W.4.5: With guidance and support from peers and adults, develop and strengthen writing as needed by planning, revising, and editing.
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Daily Learning Targets

  • I can write an ending that resolves the problem and brings the story to a close. (W.4.3e, W.4.5)
  • I can use transitional words and phrases to sequence events in my narrative. (W.4.3c, W.4.5)

Ongoing Assessment

  • Choose-your-own-adventure narrative (annotated first draft) (W.4.3c, W.4.3e, W.4.5)

Agenda

AgendaTeaching Notes

1. Opening

A. Reviewing Learning Targets (5 minutes)

2. Work Time

A. Guided Practice: Writing a Conclusion for the Millipede Draft (15 minutes)

B. Independent Practice: Writing a Conclusion for Your Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Narrative (20 minutes)

3. Closing and Assessment

A. Mini Lesson and Revisions: Adding Transitional Words and Phrases (15 minutes)

4. Homework

A. Complete at least one of the Transitional Words and Phrases practices from your homework resources for this unit.

B. Accountable Research Reading. Select a prompt to respond to in the front of your independent reading journal. 

Purpose of lesson and alignment to standards: 

  • In this lesson, students examine a mentor text to identify characteristics of narrative conclusions and best uses of transitional words (W.4.3c, W.4.3e). This lesson is divided into two parts, with Work Times A and B focusing on narrative conclusions and Closing and Assessment A focusing on transitional words. This lesson uses the terms conclusion and ending interchangeably. This is intentional. It will help students to make meaning of the academic vocabulary word conclusion and become used to hearing these two terms used together and interchangeably. As in Lessons 9-11, students use colored pencils--this time a new color--to make notes and revisions (W.4.5).
  • The research reading students complete for homework will help to build both their vocabulary and knowledge pertaining to animals and specifically animal defenses. By participating in this volume of reading over a span of time, students will develop a wide base of knowledge about the world and the words that help to describe and make sense of it.
  • Students who finish can suggest transitional words and phrases for the millipede narrative. They should write them on sticky notes and stick them on the narrative.

How it builds on previous work: 

  • This is the fourth lesson in a series focused on revising the choose-your-own-adventure narratives.
  • Continue to use Goals 1-3 Conversation Cues to promote productive and equitable conversation.

Areas where students may need additional support: 

  • Students may require additional modeling or practice in writing narrative conclusions and/or in adding transitional words. Consider allowing them to continue drafting their writing during the Additional Language and Literacy block. Alternatively, this lesson can be split over two days, allowing more time for drafting and revising the narratives.

Assessment Guidance: 

  • Be prepared to return students' Mid-Unit 3 Assessments in the next lesson with feedback.
  • Consider using the Writing Informal Assessment: Writing and Language Skills Checklist (Grade 4) during students' writing in Work Time B. See the Tools page.
  • Collect in Dialogue Practice III homework (Lesson 10). See Dialogue Practice III (answers, for teacher reference).

Down the road: 

  • In the next lesson, students will write a clean version of their narrative, incorporating the revisions they have made in Lessons 9-12.

In Advance

  • Gather the Millipede Narrative Planning graphic organizer and draft.
  • Post: Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Narrative anchor chart; Steps for Revising My Writing anchor chart (from Unit 2, Lesson 10); learning targets.

Tech and Multimedia

  • Work Time B: digital anchor chart: Instead of using chart paper, record students' thinking on a class Google Doc for them to refer to when working on their writing outside of class.
  • Work Time B: If students are creating their writing on a shared doc such as a Google Doc, ask them to color code the revisions they make in red text or highlight revisions in red.
  • Work Time AB Students complete their drafts in a word processing document, for example a Google Doc using Speech to Text facilities activated on devices, or using an app or software like Dictation.io.

Supporting English Language Learners

Supports guided in part by CA ELD Standards 4.I.C.10, 4.I.C.12, 4.II.A.1, 4.II.A.2, 4.II.C.6

Important points in the lesson itself

  • The basic design of this lesson supports ELLs by making transition language explicit. ELLs need to understand that transition words help signal relationships between the layers of English writing: phrases, clauses, sentences, and paragraphs.
  • ELLs may find transition language challenging. Students are exposed to more than 40 transition words in this lesson. ELLs may not know the meaning of most of them. Consider lightening the load for ELLs by highlighting transition words that will be most useful for their narratives. You might also provide time for ELLs to use a paper or online dictionary to translate the words. 

Levels of support

For lighter support:

  • Invite students to substitute linking phrases that are synonymous with the linking phrases on the Linking Words and Phrases handout. (e.g., By the time=When)
  • Invite students to work as the expert in home language groups with students who need heavier support. The expert can explain how to use key English linking language such as and, also, another, and so in contrast with the usage in the home language. Provide the expert with simple sentences to link as a demonstration for other students.

For heavier support:

  • Remind ELLs that U.S. narrative stories have a beginning, a middle, and an end. Today, they will work on the ending. Ask them what the beginning and middle of their narratives are about.
  • Remove the transition words from a copy of "Powerful Polly" and allow ELLs to add the correct transition word back into the blanks.

Universal Design for Learning

  • Multiple Means of Representation (MMR): Similar to previous lessons, students may be unfamiliar with some vocabulary terms introduced in this lesson's learning targets. As you introduce each learning target, consider writing synonyms or sketching a visual above each key term to scaffold students' understanding. Continue to invite students to share ways in which they worked toward similar targets from previous lessons.
  • Multiple Means of Action & Expression (MMAE): Read pages 57-59 of Can You Survive the Wilderness? with students who may struggle to write a conclusion and discuss what they can learn about narrative conclusions from this excerpt. Students who struggle to write conclusions may benefit from you highlighting or circling important words and phrases that they should use in their conclusion. Have them tell the story of their narrative to a partner, including an ending. This will give them a clear idea about what they will write during today's lesson
  • Multiple Means of Engagement (MME): Invite students to reflect on their learning from previous lessons in this unit to support students in understanding the value and relevance of the activities in this lesson. Continue to provide prompts and sentences frames for those students who require them.

Vocabulary

Key: (L): Lesson-Specific Vocabulary; (T): Text-Specific Vocabulary; (W): Vocabulary used in writing

  • conclusion, ending, transition, transitional words and phrases, temporal words (L)

Materials

  • Dialogue Practice III (answers, for teacher reference)
  • Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Narrative anchor chart (begun in Lesson 1; added to in this lesson)
  • Narrative Writing Checklist (from Lesson 3; one per student and one to display)
  • "Powerful Polly" pufferfish narrative (from Lesson 3; one per student and one to display)
  • Millipede Narrative Planning graphic organizer (from Lesson 4; one for display)
  • Practice Narrative Writing Sheet: The Millipede (completed, for teacher reference; from Lesson 7; one for display) 
  • Millipede Narrative Draft: Choice #1 (Example, for Teacher Reference; from Lesson 10; one for display)
  • Choose-your-own-adventure narrative (first draft) (from Lesson 8; one per student)
  • Expert Group Animal Narrative Planning graphic organizer (from Lesson 5; one per student)
  • Linking Words and Phrases handout (from Module 1)
  • Blue colored pencils (one per student)
  • Steps for Revising My Writing anchor chart (begun in Unit 2, Lesson 10)

Materials from Previous Lessons

New Materials

Assessment

Each unit in the 3-5 Language Arts Curriculum has two standards-based assessments built in, one mid-unit assessment and one end of unit assessment. The module concludes with a performance task at the end of Unit 3 to synthesize their understanding of what they accomplished through supported, standards-based writing.

Opening

OpeningMeeting Students' Needs

A. Reviewing Learning Targets (5 minutes)

  • Collect in Dialogue Practice III homework. See Dialogue Practice III (answers, for teacher reference).
  • Direct students' attention to the learning targets and invite them to read the targets to themselves:
  • "I can write an ending that resolves the problem and brings the story to a close."
  • "I can use transitional words and phrases to sequence events in my narrative."
  • Display the Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Narrative anchor chart and remind students that they are working toward writing a narrative during this module.
  • Explain that they are almost finished revising their drafts, but that their narratives are missing two important elements: transitional words and conclusions. Point to these bullet points on the anchor chart.
  • Invite students to turn and talk with an elbow partner to review vocabulary from these targets by asking:

"What do we mean by conclusion?" (the ending of the story)

"What does the word transition mean?" (They help move from one thing to another, or the time between things happening.)

"What are some examples of when we have transitions during the day?" (e.g., getting out of bed and getting dressed for school, going back to class after lunch). Point out other words students may know with this same root, such as transfer. 

"What do we mean by transitional words and phrases?" (These are words that help move a story from one part to another.)

  • If students are unsure of the meanings of these terms, reassure them that they will discuss them in depth later in the lesson.
  • Invite students to take out their copies of the Narrative Writing Checklist and read aloud the following criteria on the list with you:
    • W.4.3e
    • W.4.3c
  • Ask:

"Are there any specific criteria to revising this narrative about a satisfying ending or transitional words that you should be aware of that you want to add to the checklist to make it more precise?"

  • Listen for students to suggest that these criteria are specific enough already, so they don't need to add anything more specific.
  • For ELLs: Check comprehension of conclusion and ending by asking: "What is the conclusion of your favorite story?" or "What happens in a happy ending to a movie?"
  • For ELLs: Invite students to recall and explain the language structures in the learning targets. Example: an ending that resolves the problem; brings the story to a close; to sequence events.
    • "What does resolves the problem mean?"
    • "If you don't have a pencil at school, how do you resolve the problem?"
    • "What kind of ending should you write?" (one that resolves the problem, brings story to close)
    • "What does it mean to close the story?" (end it, resolve the problem, tell what happened)
    • "How does the author bring the millipede story to a close?"
    • "Why do we resolve the problem and close the story in the ending?" (so that the reader knows what happened, to finish the story we started)
  • For students needing support attending to a class discussion: Write key words that students say or draw quick sketches on the board to help them "see" the discussion as well as hear it.  (MMR, MME)

Work Time

Work TimeMeeting Students' Needs

A. Guided Practice: Writing a Conclusion for the Millipede Narrative (15 minutes)

  • Display "Powerful Polly" and invite students to take out their copies. Explain that you will read the conclusions of this narrative aloud, and invite students to chorally read it with you. Remind students that the choose-your-own-adventure format is different from most narratives because it has more than one ending.
  • After you read, refer to the Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Narrative anchor chart. Ask:

"What did these endings have in common?"

  • Add these bullets or something similar to the anchor chart:
    • A narrative's conclusion (ending) ...
      • Resolves the problem
      • Brings the story to a close
  • Explain that students have written conclusions in the past, but they have been conclusions to informational writing, such as the informational page about their expert group animal. Help them understand the difference between narrative and informational conclusions by asking and elaborating on the following questions:

"How is the ending of a narrative like an ending of an informative text?" (It brings the piece to a close and reminds the reader of the main topic of the piece.)

"How is the ending of a narrative different from an ending of an informative text?" (It doesn't restate a topic sentence.)

  • Display the Millipede Narrative Planning graphic organizer and remind students that they have already planned the ending for this narrative.
  • Ask them to take a look at your notes in the Choice #1 boxes of the Millipede Narrative Planning graphic organizer to remind themselves of what was planned for this choice.
  • Display the Practice Narrative Writing Sheet: The Millipede (completed, for teacher reference) and point out the sequence of events in your draft: First we hear the sounds of the forest, then our character is walking along looking for a leaf, and then he finds one and has started eating it when he hears a toad.
  • Remind them that this sequence of events makes sense to the reader. If the character was eating a leaf and then looking for a leaf, readers would be confused. Tell students that this is something you would like them to keep in mind as they write their endings today. 
  • Ask students to help you continue the narrative to write the ending. Remind them that they are using "Powerful Polly" as a mentor text to write their own choose-your-own-adventure narratives.
  • Invite students to turn and talk to a partner. Ask them to reread the draft together. 
  • Ask and use equity stick to call on students to share:

"Think about your ideas: What will happen and be described in the ending?" (The problem will be resolved, or The millipede will protect himself by rolling into a ball.)

  • Drawing from the ideas the students shared, craft and write a sentence that begins to resolve the problem. See Millipede Narrative Draft: Choice #1 (Example, for Teacher Reference). Continue this process to write the rest of the resolution and concluding paragraphs.
  • Invite students to chorally read the finished ending of the millipede narrative draft they wrote as a class.
  • The millipede narrative draft is the same draft written in Lesson 7 and revised in Lessons 10, and 11. See the Teaching Note at the beginning of this lesson and the supporting materials.
  • For ELLs: To check comprehension of the conclusion, ask students which parts of the conclusion are based on research and which are based on imagination.

B. Independent Practice: Writing a Conclusion for Your Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Narrative (20 minutes)

  • Invite students to take out their choose-your-own-adventure narrative (first draft) and Expert Group Animal Narrative Planning graphic organizer. Tell them they will draft their ending paragraphs for Choice #1.
  • Remind students that they skipped lines when they wrote their drafts and to skip lines when writing their endings.
  • Explain that they will plan and write the ending for Choice #2 in Lesson 14 for the End of Unit 3 Assessment.
  • For ELLs and students who may need additional support with writing fluency: Allow students to pair-share their ideas for their narrative ending before they begin writing. To reinforce the language, invite students to report back to the class, briefly retelling their ending. (MMAE, MME)

Closing & Assessments

ClosingMeeting Students' Needs

A. Mini Lesson and Revisions: Adding Transitional Words and Phrases (15 minutes)

  • Bring students together whole group and focus their attention on the learning targets. Read the following one aloud:
  • "I can use transitional words and phrases to sequence events in my narrative."
  • Remind students that informative writing also includes transitional words, and even though they are writing a "research-based narrative" and are putting in a lot of information, they are actually telling a story. 
  • Tell students that in narratives, one common and important type of transition is words or phrases that indicate that time has passed. These are also called temporal words.
  • Invite students to retrieve their Linking Words and Phrases handout and to read the Temporal Words and Phrases (Time Order) in the first column.
  • Ask students to look back at "Powerful Polly." Tell them that in a moment, you would like them to follow along as you read the first section aloud (stopping at "How can I defend myself?"). Ask them to raise their hands if they see a transitional word or phrase that is either on the handout already or could be added.
  • Begin reading. Watch for students to raise their hands at the phrases "It was a warm tropical morning" or "a moment later." 
  • If productive, cue students with a challenge:

"What if we remove a moment later? What if we replaced a moment later with eventually? I'll give you time to think and discuss with a partner." (If we remove a moment later, we lose the sense of the timing and urgency of the events. A moment later sounds suspenseful and urgent because it's quick; eventually sounds relaxed because it's a longer amount of time. It doesn't fit with the story.)

  • Distribute blue colored pencils and post the Steps for Revising My Writing anchor chart and tell students that today they will use blue to add transitions to their writing:
    • Choose the correct colored pencil. Today's color is_____.
    • Decide where you are going to add a revision note based on feedback or new learning.
    • Write your revision note in the space above the sentence you want to change. 
    • Read through your entire narrative and continue to record your revision notes.
    • Review your revision notes to be sure they make sense.
  • Invite students to reread their narrative drafts and identify places where they could add transitional words. Remind them to make these revision notes using the blue colored pencils in the blank lines above their writing. Explain that this will make it easy for them to reread their drafts and make changes without having to erase or cross out phrases. 
  • Have students move to their own workspace. Circulate to confer and support them as needed.
  • Invite students to record 'Y' for 'Yes' and the date in the final column of their Narrative Writing Checklist if they feel the criteria marked on their checklists have been achieved in their writing in this lesson.
  • Focus students on the learning targets. Read each one aloud, pausing after each to use a checking for understanding protocol for students to reflect on their comfort level with or show how close they are to meeting each target. Make note of students who may need additional support with each of the learning targets moving forward.
  • For students who may need additional support with reading support: Consider circling transition words in advance on their copies of "Powerful Polly." Also consider marking places on students' narratives where they could consider adding a transition word. (MMR)
  • For ELLs: As students write, jot down samples of effective communication from ELLs. Also jot down one or two common transitional errors (pervasive, stigmatizing, critical). Share each of these with the class, allowing students to take pride in the effective communication and correct the errors. (It's not necessary to identify who communicated well or who made errors. However, you might wish to pull the student aside to make it clear.) Alternatively, you may wish to discuss the errors with the individual students as you circulate. Students can add these notes to their language error logs.

Homework

HomeworkMeeting Students' Needs

A. Complete at least one of the Transitional Words and Phrases practices from your homework resources for this unit.

B. Accountable Research Reading. Select a prompt to respond to in the front of your independent reading journal.
  • For ELLs and other students who may need additional support: To provide heavier support, focus students on one paragraph of the Transitional Words and Phrases homework. Consider providing them with a small bank of transition language to choose from as well.
  • For ELLs and students who may need additional support with reading and writing: Refer to the suggested homework support in Lesson 1. (MMAE, MMR)

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